For the Area Safety Scheme, or ASS, the motorists will have to paid the 2 cents for each kilogram of vehicle weight. The ASS will be in effect between 8:34am to 6:56pm, with a safety lunch break between 1pm and 1:30pm.
For the Duty for Undesirable Motorized Bikes, or the DUMB scheme, all motorized vehicles that can fit between 2 vehicles in the traveling lanes will have to pay S$5.21 a day. The duty will have to be paid in person at the Jurong Ship Yard. For those bikers who do not weave between the cars, the Straits Times understands that life is not fair. For those taxi drivers who are thinking of applying for the proposed DUMB scheme, a minimum of 3 caning is mandatory for any applicants who are deemed kiasu.
And lastly, for the Redundant Insurance Plan, or RIP, all licensed drivers will be automatically insured once the car being driven has left the carpark. Collection booths will be erected at each carpark to collect this fee. This plan was greeted with enthusiasm since there is one more insurance scheme for the insurance crazy S'poreans.
The fine for each of the offense will be determined at the later date since the government is running out of room to store all the budget surplus. Plan has been considered to move all the budget surplus to a Swiss bank account.
SINGAPORE, September 1 (TCBY) - In the first incident of its kind, a young female driver was killed while driving on the ECP because of lack of visibility. The police has determined that the NUS student could not see out of her front windshield because of all the stickers that were pasted on it. She has recently purchased an ASS (Area Safety Scheme) sticker and it covered up her last remaining space, or the last hope, for a clear vision. She apparently was driving by instinct until she crash into a gantry on the ECP. Ironically, the gantry was an advertisement for the RIP or the Redundant Insurance Plan which she fails to purchase. She was ticketed for failing to have RIP while driving. When the vehicle was recovered, there were a total of 47 stickers pasted on the windshield.
In response, government has recently started an effort to require all vehicles sold in Singapore to increase the size of the windshield by a minimum of 20% to accommodate more schemes currently on the drawing board.